Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Randomize
