Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
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