he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
