I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
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