Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Randomize
