there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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