last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
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