A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
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