Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
Randomize
