i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
