I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
