He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
