You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize
