we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Randomize
