i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Randomize
