Hey man sorry I got all grabby
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Randomize
