I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
Why is there bacon in the couch?
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