I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Randomize
