Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize
