everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize
