but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
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