you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
