i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize