Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
Randomize
