I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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