I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
