hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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