There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
Randomize
