its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
Randomize
