Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
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