Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
My bed smells like the plague
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
