it hurts more in the daytime
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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