went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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