I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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