Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
