I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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