at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
