I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
