I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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