it hurts more in the daytime
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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