i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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