was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
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