haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Randomize
