that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
