Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Randomize
