i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Well I just put wine in my tea
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
