turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
