Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
