Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Randomize
