my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Randomize
